Clit Blocked at Cinema l'Amour

In my last post, I left you hangin’ mid-action, during an anonymous group sex hookup at Cinema l’Amour. If you recall, yours truly and a hot blond were both sucking the same cock, “licking him lengthwise, our tongues touching over the arc of his hard on....”

I wish that were true. 

Let me tell you what actually happened. 

Missed Opportunity 

Two unremarkable couples in their 50s were hogging the private booths, so PC and I had to sit in an open area near the stairs. That’s when an overpowering, rose-scented (?) chemical fragrance assaulted my nose — the kind strong enough to hide the smell of decomp (or maybe piss from the theatre below?). Once my nose adjusted to it, it was tolerable. Maybe even pleasant. 

The hot pair I described in this post did come in, escorted by the manager. By what I could discern in the half-light, they were both horny, and we did make eye contact. Sadly, they left. (Did PC and I miss an opportunity? Should I have gone over to talk to them? Probably....) 

Granny Fetish & Funeral Flowers 

Shortly thereafter, the blue-haired crowd started pouring in. Hey, I’m open-minded. I hope that at 80 I’m still going to peepshows and having sex. But I don’t wanna see people who remind me of my grandparents fucking — not for another four decades at least. What’s worse, PC freaked me out a little. He wanted to stay and watch. “Do they have sex like us?” he asked me, giggling. “Dude! Do you have a granny fetish you’d like to tell me about?” Seriously. I was scandalized. (In case you do have a granny fetish and would prefer to see an artsy rather than porny version, check out the beautiful, erotic German film Cloud Nine, released in 2008.)

Wanna hear the worst part of it all? (If you’ve read me this far, I know it’s ‘cause you’re as morbidly curious as PC.) After the grannies sat down in front of us, the obnoxious pairs in the booths (who knew each other, by the way) had visitors. Two more rough couples from the sticks made an appearance. If you’re thinking orgy, think again.

All they did was talk. We overheard their convo (how couldn’t we – they carried on like they owned the place). If you’re imagining that they were discussing  anything remotely related to sex, you’re way off base. Aside from bitching about junkie kids, mortgages, and bunions (I kid you not), this was the highlight: One of the guys proudly confessed to stealing flowers from graves in the cemetery behind his house for his wife's birthdays. He claimed that it saved him money on "stupid" gifts.

Occupy Cinema l'Amour: Just a Dream?

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I made up the tag-team cock sucking, group fucking, or the pussy eating (wait, did I tell you about the pussy eating?). PC and I have lived it — at the old Celeste on Saint-Hubert Street, at L’Orage.... It just didn’t happen at Cinema l’Amour. Yet. 

Get where I’m going with this? Now do you understand why we need to occupy this porn theatre? All of it could happen, and more. Dammit, it will happen – if we mobilize. If you, dear reader, show up, along with your play friends. 

Keep in mind that I don’t want to oust the current clientele. What I do want is to have a weekday/weekend afternoon place to go for a quick orgy without a big Friday/Saturday night at the club kinda production, or having to deal with a get-a-locker-and-hang-out-in-a-towel-and-don’t-forget-to-bring-flip-flops hassle either. Wouldn’t it be great to have a 5 à 7 orgy locale on the Plateau? 

Finally, wouldn’t it be great if the cinema featured better porn? 

A woman can dream....